Rory's Past
by KDS99
Summary: What if Rory used to have a an older sister that he doesn't talk about anymore? Why is he so overly protective of Amy? What happens when the Doctor starts asking questions? Will it lead to closure of an old burden following Rory? Rated T for slight adult content: suicide from over-dosing, self-harm. T just to be safe.
1. Rachel

Rory was asleep leaving him and Amy hanging out by the controls. He'd been asleep for a couple of hours now. The Doctor was repairing a few controls, and Amy was busy a self-thumb war. The left was winning. Nothing interesting. Then the Doctor said something; something that led to the truth behind Rory. It was a truth that the Doctor had never even thought of as possible.

"Amy, have you ever noticed that Rory just seems to always be a little **too** overly protective? I know you're married, but he still seems to be even more protective sometimes," the Doctor said.

"He's been through a lot," Amy replied. She was hiding something. The Doctor could sense it. There was something about Rory that he didn't know, something important.

"Well, he was picked on as a child; tormented for being geekier than the other kids. He never really had a lot of friends. Of course he's protective.

"Doctor, hasn't he ever told you the real reason those kids picked on him? Hasn't Rory told you why? " Amy asked shocked. She assumed Rory had told him at some point. It was pretty big. How could the Doctor not have known?

"No. What happened?" the Doctor asked. "Why did they pick on him?"

"Doctor, Rory has a complicated past. Something happened to him when he was really young that's followed him for a long time," Amy said sternly.

"Amy, what happened?"

"I shouldn't even be telling you this. This is his past, not mine. He should be telling you," Amy said trying to get out of this conversation. "Why don't you just ask him yourself?"

"I'm asking you because I trust you to tell me the truth. Rory, he might not tell me everything. You know that too. But you….you'll tell me. You tell me and him everything. Why did those kids all those years ago pick on him?" the Doctor spoke. He always knew just what to say.

"Rory, he used to have a sister; an older sister. They were really close when he was younger. She protected him from everything and played with, told him stories, and helped through a lot of things. They were best friends," Amy said after a long pause. She felt like she was going behind Rory's back by telling the Doctor this, but he did need to know if he was to truly understand where Rory comes from.

"What was her name?" the Doctor asked. "And what do you mean 'used to have a sister'? What happened to her?"

"Her name was Rachel. She was absolutely wonderful. She was always smiling. Whenever you saw her, she just had this huge smile on her face, but even with that, she had these huge sad eyes. She used to take Rory when he was 6 out on these walks, and he would ask why she looked sad and happy…and she would just look at him and say that she was sad because life was terrible but he made her happy again. Then she would just stand there and hug him like she might never get the chance again."

"Did you ever meet her?" the Doctor asked.

"No. I never got the chance. All I know is what Rory told me about her," Amy said sadly.

"Was she nice?"

"When Rory was sad or upset, she told him that he couldn't be sad because he had to keep her happy, and he would ask why she needed him to make her happy. She never told him for a long time, but then one day when he asked, she answered. She said that she couldn't make her own happiness, but that he could. She told Rory that he could always make himself happy just by being himself."

"She sounds so…mysterious," the Doctor said.

"She was. Used to always think that she was always happy with sadness inside her because that's what Rory had always told me, but then, he told me one day he said that when he was 7, she was outside sitting by herself, and she was crying. He didn't know why she was crying, so he went outside and sat next to her. That's when he noticed something new about her. He looked at her arm and asked what happened to her, and all she said was that she was sorry." By now, Amy had tears start to build up.

"Did she really…?"the Doctor asked.

"Yeah. She did. She told him not to tell anyone, so he stayed quiet. She said that he couldn't say anything about it. He couldn't tell their mum and dad. She was so scared that someone would find out and they would take her away. Then she couldn't see Rory again. Rachel loved Rory, more than anything. He was her favorite person in the whole world. So he stayed and sat with her while she cried. She sat there and cried for what seemed like hours," Amy said. "She just couldn't stop crying."

"Why don't you go to bed? We can finish some other time," the Doctor said to Amy. He couldn't stand to his friend cry. It drove him mad.

"What happened?" Rory said. He was standing off to the side after being asleep for hours.

"I was telling him about Rachel," Amy said.


	2. The Meadow

"Rachel? My sister Rachel?" Rory asked stunned.

"I thought he should know," Amy said.

"Actually I asked something and it sort of turned into this Rachel story. I just ended it. I decided to save the rest for another day," the Doctor said trying to prevent problems.

"Why don't I just finish?" Rory asked. "She was my sister?"

"Really? What is with this 'was'? What happened?" the Doctor asked impatiently.

Rory looked over and saw that Amy had already left and went to bed leaving him and the Doctor to themselves. That's when the Doctor informed Rory on what Amy had told him.

"Well, after she stopped crying, I took her hand and we walked back to my room. Rachel looked at me and said that if something ever happened I had to keep being happy because it made me who I am. The next morning I woke up to my mum yelling at Rachel, so I hid and listened in," Rory said.

"Rory, you don't have to say anything you don't want to."

"I want to. You deserve to know. It's who I am; it's my past. You know Amy's. You should know mine," Rory said.

"Keep going," the Doctor said trying to get the story to continue.

"I heard my mum saying something about my sister being mental and unstable; that she shouldn't be alone with me. She thought Rachel was going to hurt me. She was wrong though. Rachel would hurt someone if they did something to me. They wouldn't live to see the next day, but she would never do something to me. Then I heard Rachel say that my parents were terrible and awful. Then she ran out and slammed the door behind her, so I snuck out the window and followed her."

"Rory, how much older was she than you?" the Doctor asked.

"She was 7 years older than me," Rory said. "Why?"

"Just wondering. Go on."

"Well, I followed her to this meadow where she would take me when I was sad so she could show me the clouds and the birds flying. When she got there, she stopped in the middle of the field and turned around and looked at me like she knew I was there the whole time."

"Rory, go home. Go home and stay in your room till I get back, and don't come out. Don't tell Mum," Rory said.

"Is that what she told you?"

"That's actually what she said a lot. When I was 7, she started to change. She wasn't as happy or smiley as she was before. We went on less and less walked. She spent most of her time crying."

"Rory, what did you do after she said for you to go home?"

"I left and did what she said. I went home, went to my bedroom, and waited for her to come back. I waited for 5 hours. Mum kept trying to get me to go outside and play, but I refused."

"Did your Mum and Rachel get along?"


	3. Night of Tragedy

"What?" Rory asked.

"Your mum and Rachel; did they get along? It's not a hard question, Rory," the Doctor said.

"No. Not really. I remember hearing them fight when I was a kid. My mum would always say that Rachel was going to hurt me, so Rachel would start protesting and saying that she couldn't if she wanted to. I believe her; Rachel. I knew that there was no way she could ever hurt me," Rory said. He really did have a complicated childhood.

"So what happened when she came home?" the Doctor asked trying to get back on topic and continue on with the story.

"That night, Rachel came into my room. It was late; really late. Our parents had already gone to bed, and I thought she had too. But she came in and woke me up. She kept saying that she loved me no matter what happens. Then started crying and saying that she was sorry, so I asked why, and she just said that she was leaving and was going to do something. Something terrible. Then she gave me an envelope."

"Oh Rory," the Doctor said sympathetically.

"Give this to Mum and Dad in exactly 1 hour," Rory said. "That's what she told me. Then she tucked me back in bed, said she loved me, turned, and walked out the door. When the door shut, I could hear her crying in the hallway while she went to her room. Then I waited. I waited 1 hour," Rory said with so much sadness. "I got up and woke up my parents and had them read the note Rachel gave me. That's when they started crying. I was too young to understand why. They just ran into her room and told me go to bed. I tried to go to sleep, but I couldn't sleep because all I could see was Rachel's face when I closed my eyes. She was everywhere. It seemed like I was seeing every memory I had of her. That's when I started crying. I finally understood what she meant when she said she was leaving." Rory had started crying. The tears just came out.

"Why don't we pick up on this some other time…Rory, I'm so sorry," the Doctor said.

Rory went back to his and Amy's room. The Doctor stayed at the controls. He still had a few more wires to hook up before they could travel anywhere in space. When Rory arrived at his room, he found Amy wide awake. She was sitting up as if she had been waiting for him to get back.

"Amy?"

"How far did you get? How much does he know?" Amy asked. "Does he know what 'used to' means now?"

"Yeah, he does. He seemed kind of shocked. I guess he thought that my life had always just been happy and cheery, but it wasn't. My sister committed suicide when I was seven, I was bullied at school because of it, my sister and mum were always arguing , and Rachel never seemed happy no matter what I did. I never understood it. Rachel was never picked on or bullied. She and Mum got into an occasional fight, but they never got too serious. Why did she do it then? She just left me. I feel like if I had just said something right before she left my room that she'd still be alive. If I had just told her that I loved her too, she might still be here. But I didn't, so does it make it my fault?" Rory had started to cry again. Amy just held him and tried to sooth him.

"Rory, you were just a kid. You couldn't have known that she was going to kill herself. How could you? You were too young to understand what any of it meant. It was not your fault. Some people just have a hard time seeing the light and finding happiness; just like Rachel. And that drove her mad inside. She couldn't handle it anymore, so she let go. Nothing you could have said would have stopped her. Rory, look at me. It was not your fault," Amy said sternly. How was it that she could always say the right thing to calm you down, make you laugh, or just fall in love? Amy had a connection with Rory just like Rachel did. And he wasn't going to let anything happen to her.


	4. Lost

The next day, the Doctor took Amy and Rory back home for a quick visit. They walked around and talked. Nothing big really happened for most of the morning. No aliens came and attacked the Earth, but around noon, Rory began to act strange.

"Rory, what's wrong?" Amy asked when she noticed his odd behavior.

"I want to show you guys something," he said. He took the Doctor and Amy to an empty meadow. It was beautiful. The sky was the perfect shade of blue, the wind gave off a gentle breeze, and the birds sang and chirped like they always did.

"What is this place?" the Doctor asked. "I like it. It's nice and peaceful; very relaxing."

"This is where Rachel used to take me all the time when I was little. We would lie down and look up at the sky. I would talk for a while, and she would listen. Then she would point out clouds up in the sky and ask me what they look like," Rory said.

"That one looks like little bunny rabbit," the Doctor said. They all laughed. Even in the darkest of times, the Doctor could always make someone smile and laugh because that's who he was. He was the one who cheer everyone up just by saying the smallest of a sentence. That's how powerful his words were.

"One time when I was little, I drove by here during the day and saw a girl and boy looking up and pointing. Was that you?" Amy asked. "Was that you and Rachel when you were younger?"

"Yeah. After she died, the kids at school started to pick on me. They would use Rachel against me and call her the girl who took the pills. They would say that the reason she killed herself was because she couldn't stand being related to a geek like me."

"Rory, that can't be true. Who would do that? That's just low," the Doctor said. "And I know low?"

"Doctor, have you ever lost someone?" Amy asked.

"What?"

"Have you ever lost someone? Because something big happened and they died?" Amy repeated. "You're involved in a lot of dangerous stuff. You've had to have lost someone." The Doctor took a long pause before he spoke, but when he did talk, all happiness had left. All that came out was dark and sad.

"I have. I have lost someone. They were….they were my best friend. I didn't get to finish my good bye," he said.

"What happened to them? Rory asked. "Who were they?"

"Her name was Rose; Rose Marion Tyler. She was my best friend. She's on the list of the dead, but she's very much alive. When I said goodbye, I lost the connection before I could say…"

"You could say what?" Amy demanded.

"It doesn't matter. I saw her one more time after that, but now I can never see her again. The gap in our universe to her new one is closed and no one can get through. She has this human-clone thing of my past incarnation, so in a way, she still has me, but I can't be with her. Enough about me. You?"

"I feel better now. Now you know about my sister, and I feel like I don't have to hide her," Rory said.

"Just know this: I'm sure if Rachel could see you now," the Doctor said, "she'd be very proud."


	5. One Last Talk

"Rory, Amy….come with me," the Doctor said once they were all back in the TARDIS. "I want to do something."

"What is it, Doctor?" Amy asked.

"Where are going?" Rory asked.

"I think you should be asking **when **are we going," the Doctor replied.

When the TARDIS stopped, the Doctor led Amy and Rory outside. They were still home, but some years in the past. They were in the park. Why had the Doctor brought them here?

"Why are we here?" Rory asked.

"Rory, look," Amy said. She pointed over to a bench where girl sat crying. It was Rachel. The Doctor had brought Rory back to see her.

"Doctor…what do I say?" Rory asked. "Do I ask? I don't know."

"Just say hi," the Doctor said as he pushed Rory trying to get him to walk.

"Doctor, when you said you didn't get to tell Rose something….what was it? What were you going to tell her?" Rory asked before he went to see Rachel.

"I was going to say I love you."

"Did you ever tell her?"

"Yes. Now go to her. Go to Rachel. We can't stay for long."

When Rory got to Rachel, she had stopped crying, but the tears were still on her face. He sat down next to her and looked the other way. This was so hard. What was he going to say?

"Why are you crying?" he finally asked.

"I'm not crying anymore," she replied trying to wipe off her tears.

"Then why **were** you crying?" he said.

"It's…I'm about to do something tonight. Something really bad," Rachel said. The Doctor brought Rory to the day she killed herself.

"What's your name?" Rory asked.

"Not sure if I should tell a stranger my name, but seeing as I'm leaving town tonight it doesn't really matter. It's Rachel; Rachel Williams," she said. "And yours?"

"Rory," he replied.

"That's my little brother's name," Rachel said oblivious to the fact that he was her little brother.

"Good name…so are you taking your brother when you leave town?"

"Oh god no. I could never take him. He has to stay here. Well, I have to go. It was nice meeting you, Rory. Do you mind if I ask you something?"

"Go ahead," Rory said.

"If you knew someone for a long time and loved them, but then one day they…I don't know…killed themselves. Would you still love them or would your love turn to hate?" she asked.

"I think that's a matter of opinion, but I'll tell you this. People named Rory usually very loving people," Rory said to Rachel.

"I'm you are. Well, bye!" Rachel said as she turned and left.

When Rory was back on the TARDIS, he didn't talk for a long time. He just sat and sat there. Amy tried to comfort him, but after a while, she just went bed leaving Rory and the Doctor alone. Then he started to speak.

"Thank you, Doctor," Rory said.

"You're welcome. I am a fan of making people happy when they're sad," he replied.

"That was the day she died. It was the afternoon before she killed herself. That's why she was crying. She was crying because she was sad about what she was going to do."

"Rory, she didn't commit suicide because she didn't love you. Rachel loved you very much with all her heart. She loved you more than anything. She did it because she felt like she couldn't go on anymore with life. Like the world would just be unbalanced and wrong if she lived. That's why she did it," the Doctor said.

Rory seemed happier after that day. He felt better inside, like his feelings about Rachel were finally put to rest. Everything felt right. He no longer had to wonder if Rachel was worried about that night or if she was just plain sad. Those thoughts were gone, and Rory loved it. His head was clear. He had a great future ahead of him. You can't choose what happens to you, but you can choose what you do after that and how you react to it. You go on and pick the future you want. That's life. It's not always clear and simple, but that's how it was. And Rory loved it.


	6. AN

Hey everyone! Sorry for that little mistake where I posted the same chapter twice. It has been fixed now, so some of you might not have seen it, but if you did, so sorry. That was a total mistake. Anyways...keep reading. I'll have some more chapters for you soon. Bye! :)


	7. The Letter

Later that night while Amy was sleeping, Rory got up and walked around the room. He was still shocked that the Doctor had taken him to see Rachel. He was glad though. After a while, Rory got out some of his things that he kept with him on the TARDIS. There was something there that he needed to see. It was what he thought to be his last words from Rachel. He needed to read them again.

When Rory found the letter, he quietly snuck out and went into the control room. It was empty. Everyone was asleep. Rory sat down and removed the letter from the envelope. It was left for him by Rachel on her bedside table that night of tragedy. Even though he had read it dozens of times, Rory still found something new in her words every time. Now he was going to read again for what may be his final closure of sister's death.

_Dear Rory,_

_ I am so, so sorry that you are reading this. I truly am. I've tried so hard to keep my cool and not do anything that could hurt you, but I've been losing it lately. I need to go. It's not your fault. You've done nothing wrong. It's me. _

_ Rory, you are so young; too young to have to go through this. You might not understand it now, but some day you will. You won't see me again. Our walks, cloud watching, and meadow talks will stop, but don't forget them. Please don't forget. Once something is forgotten, it can never truly come back._

_ Keep being happy. Be happy but not for me. Be happy for yourself because you are an amazing and absolutely brilliant person. You can be happy just by being you, and in my book, that's the most important thing a person can do. Be happy. It's something I've never truly mastered, but I do feel like I got love down pretty good._

_ I love you, Rory. Remember that. I love you more than anything else in this entire world, and I mean it. I really do. Even though I haven't always told you that I did or showed you, I've never stopped loving you. My love for my little brother has been constant since Day 1. And that's a fact._

_ Someday you'll have a life. You'll have a job, friends, a wife, and a family. That's something I can never have now, and I'm actually ok with that. I could never see me in one of those positions. When you do start that life, keep me with you. Remember me. I don't want to become some girl whose memory become lost and forgotten that no one remembers. Don't let that happen._

_ When the day does comes that you do have kids, I'll just become a story you tell them. You'll tell them stories of the great Rachel Williams who died long before her time. They'll ask questions, and you'll answer them. You'll tell them of how she took her own life, but they won't understand until they're older. Just make sure when you do tell them my story that you make me a good one because it was. My life was a great story of love for a young boy and brother and search for happiness in our big, big world. Make that story a good one._

_ Love Always,_

_ Rachel Ann Williams_

When he had finished reading, Rory tried to find the new discoveries found in Rachel's letter like he always did, but when he looked, he found only one. He found something that she had been right. Rachel had become just a story that he told. She became a story of a girl who took her own life at such a young age and left a little boy by himself without his sister. But she was still a fantastic story because of her love. Even in all her darkness, she still loved him. She never stopped, and Rory never really stopped either. He still loved her. Rory had two special girls with a permanent spot in his heart: Amy and Rachel. And that's all Rachel wanted. All she ever wanted was to be remembered in a good story about a girl who never stopped loving.


	8. Thank You

Rory looked up to see the Doctor standing in the doorway as is he had been there the entire time Rory had been reading the letter. The Doctor came in and sat the next to Rory where he was handed the letter. The Doctor read Rachel's final letter before giving back to Rory.

"That was her letter to me. I thought it was going to be the last thing that I'd ever hear from her, but I guess not anymore since I got to go see her," Rory said. "Thank you, Doctor."

"You're welcome. I don't like having sad people on board. It just makes everything sad, so whenever someone is sad, I try to make them happy again. Happy people make me happy," the Doctor replied. "She's the reason you became a nurse, isn't she?"

"What do you mean?" Rory asked puzzled and confused.

"You felt like you could have saved her that night but you didn't, so you became a nurse to redeem yourself and save other people's lives. Am I right?"

"I guess. I never really thought of it that way, but now that I'm hearing it out loud, I think you're right. You are right," Rory replied. "So what now?"

"Now we continue on with our lives. That's really all we can do in this world, just carry on. Life doesn't stop for anyone, so we have to keep going or we'll never get anywhere. It's the sad and cruel truth of life," the Doctor said.

"How old was she?" Rory asked. "How old was Rose when you lost her, if you don't mind me asking?"

"No, I don't mind. She was 20. We traveled for two years together. Well actually she came with me, and when I brought her back home for a visit, I brought her back to the wrong year, so what was only a day for her was a year for her poor mother all alone at home and her friend Mickey. Then we traveled for two years. I brought her back several times for visits, so she still got see her mum. But in all it was two years," the Doctor replied.

"It sounds complicated," Rory laughed. The Doctor chuckled back.

"It was. I should really go to bed," the Doctor said.

"I should too. Goodnight," Rory said as he got up and headed towards his room. Just before he could leave, Rory turned to the Doctor one more time. "Thank you, Doctor."


	9. I'm Fine

"Doctor, I need to talk to you," Amy said the next morning before Rory had woken up. He was sound asleep in bed. For last few days, he looked as if he hadn't had a full night's rest in a very long time. He needed all the sleep he could get. Rory just wasn't himself without sleep. Who could blame him? Sleep was nice. Having enough sleep every night was even better.

"What is it, Amy?" the Doctor asked as he turned to face Amy. She motion for him to sit next her, so he did so. She looked happy but not for herself. She looked happy for Rory. If he was happy, then so was she. It's just who they are and who they are together.

"I wanted to thank you for taking Rory back to see Rachel. It meant a lot to him…and to me. He's very special to me, and seeing him that happy to see someone that close to him is absolutely wonderful. I don't think I've ever seen him that alive and full of spirit. You helped him settle something that's been troubling him since he was a kid," Amy said. "You really helped him. Thank you, Doctor."

"Well, you're welcome. I'm always happy to reunite families and friends whenever I can. I just love to see those faces of joys at reunions. I love to see a sparkle pop into their eyes at just the sight of someone special to them. It helps me see that I don't just destroy things and wipe out species. I bring people joy and hope. That's all I've wanted. That's all I really longed for when I first started traveling so many years ago. If anything, you two and all of my other companions have helped me. So….thank **you**," the Doctor replied. Before he could even take a second to breathe, the Doctor was surprised by a great big hug from Amy. He didn't know such a small girl could give a hug that big. It really took him by surprise, but at the same time, he liked it. He really did. It felt special.

"I need to tell something. Late last night, I woke up, so I decided to take a stroll around the TARDIS, and I found this picture. Is this Rose?" Amy asked as she held up a picture of a blonde woman and a man with a brown suit. The woman was absolutely beautiful and had a warming smile. There was something about her smile that just made you know that she was a friend and could be trusted.

"Yeah, that's her, and that man is me. That's what I used to look like. That was my tenth incarnation. I'm on my eleventh right now. This is my eleventh face," the Doctor said as he took the picture into his hands and looked deeply at the woman. He began to smile as he thought of his old memories of Rose, but he brushed them off.

"Doctor, if Rose was still here, I know she'd be proud of you," Amy said as she got up to leave. She turned and headed towards the room she shared with Rory.

Even though he knew Amy couldn't hear him, the Doctor said, "I hope so."

"Rory, wake up," Amy said when she got to her bedroom. Rory groaned and turned over to the other side so that he facing away from Amy. "Rory, up…now!"

"Fine," Rory said as he got up from the bed and made his way to the closet to change out his pajamas.

"How are you doing?" Amy asked.

"I'm fine. Really, I'm fine," Rory replied. "I perfectly okay."

"Are you sure?" Amy protested. She was still very worried about him.

"Amy, if I wasn't, you could sense it. You always do," Rory said trying to get her off his back. "Do you think something's wrong?"

"No, I guess not. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. You can't blame me for worrying about you. That's a lot of stuff to process in such a short amount of time," said Amy as she hugged Rory.

"I know, but I promise you, I'm fine. Trust me," he replied, and she believed him.


	10. Souls

"Where to today?" Rory asked the Doctor when he finished getting dressed.

"Pick any year with four digits," the Doctor said. "Then point to a random spot on this here globe. That's where we'll go."

"Uh…1998 France," Rory replied. "Anything good happen then and there?"

"Let's find out."

After their fun in France, the trio headed back to the TARDIS. As they entered, they all threw their coats to the side and went straight to bed. All of them were completely exhausted. They had done quite a bit in France, the Doctor stayed mostly in a library while Amy and Rory toured the streets with amazement. For everyone though, it was just day letting the soul finish healing. That's what the Doctor does. He helps people heal their broken soul after being broken from tragedy and despair. He comes along, adjusts his bow tie, and goes off to work. Then he'll keep at it until everyone is fixed, and for once, Rory had finally seen it.


	11. Epilouge

_When you begin your run with the Doctor, you don't expect anything to form between you. You think that you're just traveling, but you're wrong. You become friends. You learn things about him, and he learns things about you. You learn of his past just as he does yours. It never occurs to you when you first run away with him that someday it'll end though. You'll end. You'll die just like everyone does. The Doctor, out of the whole universe, knows that more than anybody. He's seen people die, he's held their hand, he's made them die, and he's tried to prevent. He's done it all. When I ran away, I didn't know what would happen. Not for one moment did I think it would ever end; it never occurred to me. But now I see that everything comes to an end. It's happy when it starts, but once it ends, it's quite sad. Rachel ended her life, and I was sad. My parents were sad. Everyone was sad. I think the Doctor was sad too when I told him what happened. When my time with the Doctor ended, Amy and I were sad, but we came to learn the truth that everything happens for a reason. We might not all always know what it is, but we know there is one. If I've learned anything from the Doctor, besides a few historical facts about fezzes, it's that every choice, action, event, and existence has a reason. _

_-Rory Arthur Williams (Age 85)_


End file.
